I want to start by apologizing to any of my Tinder beaus who found my blog and are now reading this post. Also, kudos on your creepiness from a fellow creeper.
If you're a single gal living in a metropolitan area, you can relate when I say that dating blows. It's totally different than "back home," wherever that may be. In the DC area, it all starts with "what do you do?" and ends with you ghosting on him after you made him pay for your $30 entree at Circa. #sorrynotsorry
Dating as an adult is not fun and it's not easy. It's a chore. I can think of about a bazillion (that's a number, right?) things I'd rather be doing than making forced, awkward conversation with a complete stranger that looks completely different (and substantially less attractive) than their pics on Tinder.
Yeah, let's talk about dating apps for a minute. I kid you not, the amount of messages I have received on OkCupid and Tinder have probably reached the 1k mark at this point. Out of those, about 99.9% are so effing creepy. I once had a complete stranger offer to fly himself out to DC so that I could take his virginity. That's weird enough without mentioning the fact that these apps match you to people based on your location. He was from Michigan. Thanks but no thanks dude.
Anyways.
So dating is hard. But I'm honestly not worried about it. No matter how many times my brother-in-law calls me a crazy cat lady. Do you know how amazing it is that I can come home at the end of a 12 hour day, walk in the door, take off my pants, and pour myself a glass of wine? If you don't know, then you're doing it wrong. Listen guys, I'm totally fine with not sharing a bathroom with someone who leaves his beard clippings in the sink, pees in the shower, or clips his toenails in the living room. My ex did that and worse. Seriously, boys are gross.
the losers that lost me*
To all the single ladies, I salute you. It's a fucking battlefield out there and I wish you the best! What are your most awkward date stories? Anyone have a frog who turned into a prince? No? Yeah, me either.
*None of these guys are losers...only in the sense that they aren't dating me.
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